It's been a while, Life has been hectic with the Holidays and just life in general. Been looking for work, which is not going so well... but it'll happen soon I hope.
I only had to re - wrap presents once this year- my husband decided to put the presents from us under the tree early, my daughter decided to have her own Christmas about 3 days too early, so I re-wrapped everything. Good thing I bought extra paper.
Christmas is a time for friends and family, and that is exactly how we celebrated our Christmas. We went out for Christmas Eve dinner with the in-laws and my husband's grandparents. YAY, it actually went well, with a 2 year old, a 6 year old, a husband who I am finally getting along with again ( we've had some ups and downs the last few months) thank goodness, my mother and father in law, my brother in law ( who is almost 17) and then 3 aunts, an uncle, and the grandparents. We managed to not make a huge scene. The two year old only had to go out side once, the 6 year old to the bathroom 3 times, and only one issue with food. ( Thank goodness again, because it seems it happens every year that someone has a problem). My daughter liked the ice cream from my banana foster dessert, our sons clothes managed to stay clean, and we only managed to have one piece of chicken being saved for later... no not in a diaper- in a shoe. Don't ask, I have no idea, but our daughter took her shoes off half way through dinner, I went to put them on to take her outside and she had chicken in her shoe. Always an adventure in Columbo Land.
Christmas day was amazing, we spent the morning at home, let the kids play with their new toys, and try on some new clothes. Then we went to my in-laws house and hung out for a bit. Let the kids open their stuff there and play for a while. Then we stopped by my moms, picked up stuff for our dinner ( she bought prime rib for hubby and I to eat at home, and made us some French onion soup) and did presents there. Then came home, I cooked, and hubby and our son played Transformers on the PS2 ( well hubby played our son watched - it's only a one player game) then played darts on hubby's new dart board. It was great.
I was actually almost relaxed.
I am going to the Doctor's on Jan 2nd, I have a physical I need done to start substitute teaching, and I am going to talk to them about putting me on something for anxiety. I have lived with it for a while, and it is finally getting to be too much. I am tired of feeling like I have coffee running through my veins, not being able to sleep, and then once finally asleep not wanting to get up in the morning. We did some research and I have a lot of the classic signs, worrying too much, irritability, fatigue ( from not really sleeping), and of course this " shakiness" that won't ever go away. So we'll see how that goes. I am just tired of feeling like a bad mom and wife because I can only handle so much before I want to just break. I have to try to laugh it off, but the feeling makes me want to scream. So I'm sure that will be updated and mentioned along the way. I figure if my problems help someone else with their own, or feel like they are not alone then I have no problem discussing it freely with the internet and live world.
So my thought of wisdom for the new year...
Only make resolutions you think you will keep.
Reach for the stars, but know they are a million miles away...
Forgive, but don't forget, just don't hold a grudge or bring up something from 5 years ago.
Smile, someone else out there may need to see it.
Try your best, and that is better than being perfect.
Last, don't be afraid to ask for help when you need it, don't ignore something that maybe obvious to everyone else around you. Take your life and gain control.
So while I'm at it, want to spice up your " private life" go check out the adult store link in the shopping section, they have some really amazing stuff for good prices.